Ghostsingles
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Ghostsingles Reddit
I'M DONE with living women. They're so fleshy and warm-blooded and urgh.
So I'm switching to the obvious alternative. Dead women.
For so long, the deceased babes of this world have been inaccessible, locked behind some great, fantastical void of grey nothingness. But thanks to the magic of the interwebs, ghosts are quickly becoming an integral part of the online dating community.
The latest tweets from @ghostsingles. You can meet other single and lonely dead folks through GhostSingles.com, a fantastic website dedicated to all the ghosts out there, no matter what century they died in. If you’ve ever dreamed.
Introducing GhostSingles.com, a dating website where ghosts can meet attractive ghost-lovers like me who are posing as ghosts.
Ghostsingles.comis a satiricaldating website for ghosts. It was created by Randy Tayler in 2009. It has been used as entertainment for internet users. Ghostsingles.com is a completely free dating website used to talk to computers acting as ghost or others pretending to be ghosts as well. The layout of ghostsingles.com is one not unlike a regular dating website. We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us.
The cornerstone of the site is a state-of-the-art search engine, which not only sorts single ghosts by their gender and age (18 years old to 1000+ years), but lets you choose between people who died horrible, mysterious, tragic or sudden deaths.
Just build a profile, complete with information like your build (wispy, ethereal, cloudy) and how you found the site (seance, fate), and you're released to frolic with the prettiest poltergeists in the universe.
After haunting the site for exactly 13 minutes, I managed to narrow my field of potential partners to four candidates. But I'm having trouble picking just one sexy spectre.
Perhaps you could help? I'll list my top four phantoms, and you can tell me which to float away with in the comments section below.
Look at those dreamy eyes in the back seat. Picture: SuppliedSource:Supplied
This 173-year-old, ethereal cougar is a straight talker who doesn't like fake smiles.
'I don't care for having one's visage marred by a perpetual smile, like some fool. That's not to say I'm not happy; the lack of a smile is not always a reliable barometer on one's emotional state.'
She's also a depressed loner who died a horrible death. She doesn't mention the details of said death in her profile, but I could always use the subject to start some interesting banter on our first date.
'In this case, however, it's true: I'm not happy. I've been miserable since the day I died, and I have sought to reconnect with the generations that came after me by appearing to them. In every case, without fail, they react with terror at my approach.'
A spritely young thing at 119, vengefull insists her disposition really isn't that bad.
'Do not be fooled by my moniker; it is a jest. Truly I am among the least vengeful of all my acquaintances.'
Anyone who uses the word 'jest' is a decent chance in my book. Still, I'm not sure I'll hit it off with her friends. That's a point against her.
'My efforts at disturbing the living take only a pittance of my time, and thus I entertain the notion of diversion. If you are likewise minded, I would be delighted to receive word.'
She sounds foxy.
'Would you like to come upstairs and check out the master bedroom?' Picture: SuppliedSource:Supplied
Her real name is Dorothy. This presents a problem, because I watched The Wizard of Oz that one time and found Dorothy to be incredibly annoying. Still, deadgrrrl seems to have a great personality, if you're into crazy cat ladies. Which of course I am.
'I used to miss my cat until she died. That was like 70 years ago, and then she was fun to have back around. Now she disappears for like a decade at a time, then comes back for a few years. Don't ask me what a dead cat's doing. Hey I thought they had nine lives! lol!!'
Wow, what a winning sense of humour. And Dorothy is so 'with it' for a 94-year-old, using youthful lingo like 'lol'.
This option's a little different, because hauntingeyes is a complete dude. But he's sooooo romantic.
Do Christians Believe In Ghosts
'I love long walks on the stairs at night; staring down at the living while they sleep; randomly clanking the chains which bound me when I was shot for my crimes in life.'
He watches random people while they sleep. Just like Edward Cullen from that Twilight thing. Psycho stalkers are so 'in' these days.
'I haven't felt the temptation to partake of succulent human flesh since my execution for crimes against humanity.'
If the guy has enough willpower to overcome cannibalism, he's good enough for me.
What's the verdict? Name my perfect match in the comments section below, or on Twitter. Just don't tell my girlfriend.
@SamClench @ghostsingles @newscomauHQ
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Want to find a dear to join you on dearly departed dates? Seeking an immortal beloved to visit some of your favorite haunts? Pursuing a soulmate to share a love that will not expire - unlike your rotting corpse?Ghostsingles.com How To Join
Well, if you're dead tired of spending death alone, then GhostSingles.com is for you.
A dating site for ghosts (with Internet access), GhostSingles.com allows all you polterguys and poltergals a chance to seek a perfect partner for ethereal excitement. Using a supernatural search engine to find a mate between the ages of 18 or 1000+ years-old - with a cause of death that varies from mysteriously, horribly, tragically or suddenly - GhostSingles.com matches you with a spectre so you can experience the paranormal as a pair.
As an added bonus, GhostSingles.com is 100% free (because you can't really take it with you), and won't even cost you your immortal soul since that's already spoken for. They even offer some free dating tips for ghosts, so all you have to do is browse and contact them via email or mediumship.
Ah yes, this was fun to write. The Internet has yet again delivered a little mirth to kill work productivity, and even if you're not a ghost, you should check out GhostSingles.com, from the mind of improv comedian/writer/Web guy Randy Tayler.